Broken

I say…

I think I might be broken

I feel like I can’t open up to any man
I say all these things, I tell all these stories
I strategically place them in the conversation

I know the reaction they’ll get now, or the range at least
I laugh at a joke, maybe it’s a real laugh maybe it’s well placed

I enjoy the act of being out with this stranger
I love hearing how people approach life
I love seeing how they place themselves in it

Then come the reactions

I don’t like how that’s similar to so and so
I prefer they didn’t speak out of the side of their mouth
I think, maybe that could be a cute quirk if I was in the right headspace

I don’t think I want this to go any further
I don’t want to have to bow out of this scene
I just want to fade into the distance, right here, right now

I just want to find that guy that gives me the reactions I’ve had few times before

I just want to feel something good again
I want to feel that connection again
I  want to look in his eyes, whoever he is, and know

I think I might be broken

Maybe you just know you need to be alone right now?
…she says

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